Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers

Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers

Thursday, December 30, 2010

severely off her rocker

After our U.S. government in their wisdom (see sarcasm) decided to close down Nepalese adoptions for an undetermined amount of time, Jessica and I felt...well, unsure. We weren't entirely certain what we should do next. But God is sovereign. God planned it so that as this fact was settling in and beginning to weigh heavy on us, we were to attend the Together for Adoption conference.

We were there by divine appointment. Along with getting to spend the weekend with some great friends (the Williams, Libby, Dr. Yeats...err, I mean John Mark), God had plans for us to hear certain things from certain people. For instance, I had no idea what "waiting" children were. Come to find out there are children in other countries waiting for parents. You may say, "Well no duh, Ryan", but only if you're a true child of the 80's. Seriously though, I thought we had to get on a waiting list to be approved and then a waiting list to be matched with kids and then wait to travel to get them. A lot of waiting. Not so. There are kids that are completely ready, waiting for parents.

I didn't want us to jump back into anything too quickly though. After all, we were just coming out of an 18 month broken relationship with Nepal. I didn't want these "waiting" children to be a rebound type of deal. We prayed and talked about whether God would have us adopt domestically, foster, foster to adopt, international, "waiting" children, or if anything at all. We were starting back at square one. After prayer and discussion we came to a decision. We still felt strongly drawn toward international adoption. And why would we get on a waiting list to adopt slightly younger children when there are children "waiting" for people to adopt them. My rational: they're waiting, we're waiting. Hmmm. Let's alleviate both our waits.

We began moving forward with the process to adopt waiting children. I say "we". Jessica did pretty much all of the work...as women should. Just kidding. The agency sent us a list (with pictures) of about 12-15 sets of siblings that were waiting in Ethiopia for parents. We looked through these pictures, asking for God's guidance. My salvation and security in Christ became more sweet (more cherished) during this process. Ephesians 1:4-6 says, "For He (the Father) chose us in Him (Christ) before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as His sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will- to the praise of His glorious grace, which He has freely given us in the One (Jesus) He (the Father) loves." In a nutshell God chose me! He chose to make ME His! Not because of ME, but because...well, I can't even fully express why! He chose to love me, in spite of me. Not because I'm lovable, but because He is Love.

That's all good and exciting, but now the connection. We had to choose. Jessica and I had the pleasure and the burden of choosing. Essentially by choosing one set of siblings, we didn't choose the other 20 something children that were waiting. Heartbreak. They are all so beautiful. They're kids. They're made in God's image. All of those kids need a home and a family. They all need to hear about God's love. All. Of. Them. I unapologetically hope you're kept awake at night with the burden to put actions to the faith and hope you claim. You may think me harsh for saying such things. You may say it's all well and good that y'all are doing that, but I shouldn't place my convictions on others. And to you I would remind that I can not convict. That is the Holy Spirit's work. And if you can walk away unchanged, unmoved, then okay. We can not.

James 1 tells us the religion that God deems as pure and faultless is to see after widows and orphans. There are many avenues this can be done: praying, giving, going, serving, and adopting. Across the street or across the world, we are commanded to minister to the least of these.

Now back to the program. Since we started looking at these pictures Jessica started falling in love with one particular group of siblings. I don't know exactly what she must have been thinking when she first told me she thought these were the ones. I know my first thought was: We're not adopting a sibling group, we're adopting a soccer team! I knew for certain that someone had snuck into my house at night and replaced my wife with some deranged look-a-like that was somehow a glutton for punishment and severely off her rocker. Four kids!?!? FOUR. The number has torn through my mind like a runaway train. It completely and utterly destroyed any coherent line of thought for days. And then it started to take root. And I began to consider it. And it started to sound...no, no, NO. It's crazy. There's no way. I prayed for God to protect the heart of my wife. "Lord," I said, "if You have other plans for these children and us please change her heart. Open other doors. Please don't let her be hurt again." All the while she fell more and more in love with these four children. And secretly, so did I.

On our way back from Louisiana we called our agency to ask some questions and get some clarification. Among the questions, we wanted to ask if we could know if there was anyone else interested in this particular soccer team, I mean sibling group. The words echoed in mind as she said that another family had requested them. In that moment I began to wonder how I would tell Jessica this news and I wished that I was someone else or somewhere else in the world, but I knew this was what I had to do. I had to be the one to break this heart-shattering news to my bride. As all of these things were swirling in my mind the agency worker continued. Then I realized she was saying something about having to tell the other family that she could not approve them. Something to do with income and that they already had children. My heart leapt with joy and at the same time hurt for that family's news. She said that we had already passed all the various requirements and if we were sure we wanted this set of siblings she would remove them from the website and send us their medical records and forty something pictures.

We said YES! Emphatically. Crazy. Don't know what all of this entails. Trying to grasp the concept of being parents. Mind racing. Weeping at the thought of some unforeseen thing standing in our way. Undeniably longing to get them quicker. So excited to begin this part of our lives. Grateful that God has led us to this point. Scared out of our minds. Reading everything we can get our hands on. Joyous occasion for celebration. Can't think. Can't breathe. Can't imagine how difficult the next few months of waiting will be.

She actually tried for a moment to talk us out of it. I say that tongue-in-cheek, but she did want to make sure we were aware of the difficulties involved, et cetera. I assured her that we had counted the cost and were as scared as we should be, not totally naive or overconfident, and we had in fact disposed of our rose-colored glasses back in the day. They don't go well with my red hair.

We can't disclose their names or pictures just yet, but it is one girl and three boys. Their ages range from 4-12. We should travel to Ethiopia in April for the first trip and again in (maybe) June to bring home our soccer team, OUR KIDS!

Thanks for reading.

38 comments:

  1. Wow! Ryan and Jessica, we are THRILLED for you guys. . .I know we've just been on the outside looking in, but its been fun to watch this process. God is GOOD and its neat to read the JOY in your words!

    Matt and kristin

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  2. Wow! CONGRATULATIONS!!! So very excited for the both of you. Curious if these are the same kids I read about on someone's blog??? I can't imagine that there would be too many sibling sets of FOUR out there! Well I hope it is...because they have been on my mind! YAY!! Can't wait to hear your next steps!

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  3. Wow Jessica and Ryan this is awesome news. So happy for you guys. Can't wait to meet the team (kids) Hope everything goes smoothly until June. I'll be praying for yall.

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  4. yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, this made my day..just heard the great news!!! I will share all the stories and sweetness of these children with you that i can...sooooooo excited...will update my blog on this wonderful news in a little bit when the kids are asleep....praise God..I know HE is smiling down...If i could scream with happiness through the computer i would..I seriously LOVED these kids...congrats from the bottom of my heart...kristi
    ps...maybe we'll travel together :)

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  5. OMG OMG OMG, YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!! I am so excited, if you can't tell. This is just incredibly awesome and having been where you are I can tell you it will all be worth it once they are with you, it will seem like you were never apart. Please let me know what we can do, besides pray of course. SO EXCITED!!!!!

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  6. This is the first time I've visited your blog - God's perfect timing!!! I've been praying for these 4 children for a few days since reading about them on KJ's blog. I've been praying and will keep praying for the hearts and home of whomever the incredible parents of these 4 would be...let the soccer match begin!! May you feel His hand on the 6 of you as you move forward as FAMILY. Congratulations!

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  7. Just......AMEN ! God be with you both on your journey to get your family home. Congratulations :)

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  8. I'm a first time reader who just popped over from Kristi's blog to say GOD BLESS YOU AND CONGRATS!!! What a ride you are in for.

    Love to you
    Melissa

    http://thelemanskis.blogspot.com

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  9. I am hopping over from "Lucy Lane's" blog and just wanted to congratulate you on this new step in your journey! We just brought our daugter home from Korea in October...child #3 in our family...life is crazy, busy, and more amazing than we could have ever imagined...God is pretty awesome that way!

    Prayers are being sent that your children will be in your arms soon!

    E. Ragsdale
    www.missionforannalee.blogspot.com

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  10. So excited for you! I have been following Lucy Lane's blog and couldn't be happier to hear that a family is taking these children!!!! I love your soccer team analogy!! May God bless you and make the wait till you have your family home with you go by quickly!!!! Praise the Lord for stirring your hearts and severely knocking your wife off her rocker!
    Catie
    neilandcatie.blogspot.com

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  11. So happy to have read about this at Lucy Lane's blog. Had to jump over here. We're in the process of bringing home our daughters (a sibling group of 4). We already have 4 sons. :-D So excited for you and happy for those 4 precious kiddies. :-)

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  12. We have been following Lucy Lane's blog too and this sibling group.....prrrrecious! God is so good! This process has taught my husband and I a deeper understanding of who God is and how He directs our paths in ways we could have NEVER imagined!!

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  13. Hi Jessica-- So incredibly happy for you and so thankful for God's confirmation in your hearts! Welcome to the 4 ET kids at once club! So great to talk to you a while ago-- if there is any way I can help you please let me know-- you are in my prayers for sure! The blessings are simply UNCONTAINABLE!! :))

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  14. Congratulations!!! I met this sweet soccer team in July on th OH mission trip! Oh, how I WISH I could be there to see the looks on their faces and the tears of happiness when they are told they now have a family!! Bless you! and may they forever bless you! :) We just arrived home a little over a week ago with our first Ethiopian son (age 3). Congratulations again! This news has just made my day so much better! Praise God!

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  15. Hmmm, I immediately posted a CONGRATS yesterday, but I don't see it. I wanted to be sure to let you know how thrilled we are!!! Those kids are certainly the answer to a long journey of prayers, waiting, and tears. What a blessing to walk alongside you guys. We love you and by the way, we LOVE that you are off your rocker--so are WE :))
    Mike and Libby
    PS. Welcome to the 4 kids club!

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  16. Very exciting that these kids will have a home!! God is good.

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  17. So excited for your family! What a blessing you guys will be for each other!

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  18. Ahhh!! I am so so so excited!! Congratulations to your family. Waiting kids have a special place in my heart and seeing these kids placed makes my heart leap!

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  19. Praise God. What a blessing to read! Will be excited to follow along........sadly it look like you guys recently moved from Ft. Worth to Austin. We could have been neighbors. :) Great adoption community in Austin for you guys.

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  20. I know you have no clue who I am, but I have been praying hard for YOU!!! This children broke my heart months ago to the point we were very seriously considering them. I talked with Sue several times. We have been in the process of adopting siblings from Ethiopia but were not matched yet. Long story I will not go into, we realized these were not our children, and that broke my heart. I have prayed for them by name for months. I have prayed for you, not knowing who you were but knowing you were out there. LOVE how God works - we were matched with our children this week! You posted this 2 days after we accepted the referral of our beautiful children that I KNOW are mine. Having this news the same week - MY HEART IS BURSTING!! Exactly the sentiments you had in your post, I felt I had turned my back on them, and God had to make sure I knew I was called to pray for them and for you. I knew that and waited for my children to come in His timing all along not forgetting your precious 4 children. BLESS YOU! We will continue to pray for you as you follow your calling! Rejoicing with you!!

    Much love,
    Candi Galbreath (Brentwood, TN)

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  21. Ryan and Jessica...aka Coach and Assistant Coach (you guys decide who is who) SO VERY excited for you guys and for these precious four! The coolest part is the people God will draw to His heart through your journey. Please know you are prayed for and we are so looking forward to following your journey.

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  22. Congratulations!! I saw your good news on Lucy Lane's blog! So happy for you and can't wait to see you united with your children!

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  23. So absolutely beautiful! Cannot wait to see the pics of your new soccer team with their coaches! Congrats!

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  24. So excited to read the big news on Krisit's blog and find the link here! Congrats and cannot wait to follow your journey to your soccer team!
    Love & Blessings from Hong Kong,
    Kim

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  25. Wonderful!! Amazing!! So excited for those kids and for you! :-)

    Congratulations!!

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  26. AMAZING! AMAZING! AMAZING!!!!!! I am so stinking excited for your family and I am going to be on the EDGE of my seat following the rest of your journey!!!!!!!!!!! And thank you for helping also spread Wiphan on your blog...I saw the button and as if my heart wasn't already bursting with your news...it burst some more. So thankful for your family and how God is using you!

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  27. I don't know if you realize the answer to soo many prayers for this sweet group of children that are your family! I am crying like a baby right now.....prayers have been answered!!! I am sooooo HAPPY FOR YOU!!! I am AMAZED at how God works over and over....I am EXCITED for you both. You are in my prayers!!! Words can not describe! NOTHING can compare to what you are doing!!!! OVERYJOYED!!!!!!

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  28. YAY!!! Oh my goodness, so excited that you are bringing these precious FOUR children HOME!! Congratulations!! Coming over from Kristi's blog! So excited to follow your journey!!!

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  29. Praise GOD!! We just returned home on the 29th from ET and met your 4!! they are very very sweet and full of smiles !!literally grabbed all of our heart!!.... We were there for court (CCI also :)... passed (Praise the Lord!) and have to leave our sweet Samson Jude there--- OH THE ACHE!--- but will return as soon as we receive our embassy date!!
    MANY many blessings to your family...

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  30. Congrats! The soccer team will keep you young! :-) I saw this on Lucy Lane's blog.

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  31. I just came over from Lucy Lane's blog, and I just wanted to thank you for your work, and say God bless you and your family :) I pray for a quick and painless process for all involved and that God's name is glorified above all!

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  32. I am overjoyed that these kiddos have found a family!!!! It broke my heart when I heard about them. I am so happy for you!!!! congratulations!!!!

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  33. We have friends adopting four children from the Philipines and have loved seeing their story unfold. Congratulations to your family!

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  34. Jessica and Ryan,
    How wonderful! It is amazing how God works His plan out in our lives even when we know how CRAZY it seems. There are days that I wished God would have told Kirk and I more so that we would understand but He knew that we needed to only rely on Him and let Him do all the work. We just have to be obedient to listen to His calling. It has been an amazing journey adopting two little boys from Ukraine and I never dreamed that God would give us "two" but I am so Thakful that He did. I can't help to think what a difference that you and Jessica will make in the lives of these children. What a difference that God will make in their lives. This is a Wonderful celebration! I will be praying for you, Jessica and the children! Our God is an Awesome God-way beyond anything we could every imagine! I am so Thankful that He chose Kirk and I to adopt. I am also Thankful that He gave ya'll the same calling. Buckle your seatbelts and hang on for the journey. It's Amazing!

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  35. Eeeeek! How exciting! What a blessing for all involved. I have a friend who adopted four kids (foster to adoption, stateside) about a year ago. She already had two other adopted kids. She has homeschooled them all this past year to encourage bonding (the four, though a sibling group, had not been together for awhile) and to catch everyone up to their appropriate grades. It's been a hard year; she's not a born teacher, and six kids has been an adjustment. But it has been worth it, and they are truly a bonded and loving family...and 3 of the newly adopted kids are now believers!
    I can't wait to hear your stories!

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  36. Congratulations! What an exciting time for all of you!!! Praying for this wait to go quickly and that you get a super fast court date to bring your family HOME!

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  37. Yay!!! Praising God!!! I'm so proud of you two.... just beyond words! God IS faithful! Thank you for following His call!!! I am so excited for these children to have you two as parents! :)
    Love to you both~ Kathy :)

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